"Dumb it down"? There's a two-edged sword here. Since your reader mentioned vocabulary, he or she might have a valid point. Skimming your piece, there are words like differentiate and demarcate. Contemporary style encourages using simpler words when they will serve your purpose -- in this case, maybe distinguish and mark (or draw a border)? I have to admit for myself "the ability of thought to concretize experience" threw me for a loop! I thought experience was concrete and thought was abstract?

On the flip side, I grit my teeth when people don't want to work at understanding writing that took serious quality thought to generate. Some of my favorite books have required me to, on average, read each paragraph twice -- the effort was more than worth it to get the author's insight! Perhaps if a piece doesn't make you work, it doesn't have much to say to begin with? Mitch, I'm not well versed in your subject matter, but my experience was seeing your thought-gears turning the whole time and maintaining traction, so I look forward to reading more from you, and working to understand it.